Nu am nimic.

Nu am nimic

https://mmmylittlecorner.blogspot.com/2020/01/hello-world.html

https://mmmylittlecorner.blogspot.com/2020/10/faptul-ca.html

.

https://web.archive.org/web/20130515015015/http://goddessazra.blogspot.com/

Thanks the Wayback Machine.

I could talk a lot in spoken or written words about my past experiences as a camgirl, cam model, whatever, but it’s useless 🙂
I used to have a blog for years, didn’t really care about it. A fost doar o tentativa, sa am si eu ceva. Fapturile de la care m-am inspirat faceau altceva, nu ce vedeam eu (nu e o scuza). Nu cautam sa invat, era despre vanzare, nu? Cei care au incercat sa fie prietenosi ~ thx ~ am fost si eu prietenoasa cu ei, mereu ‘not allowed’ de aceleasi limite/ziduri carora inca nu le gasesc sensul. Nimic nou!
.
Me in glasses.
Din jurnal:
21.02 Not moody or pessimistic. Just another day with a limited set of things to do, regardless of what I do, nothing good (really good) will happen so, in contradiction with the purpose of doing anything – I don’t wanna do anything. Penalized regardless. I don’t trust/rly like anyone. I talk to so many, but I have no one 2 rly talk to. Sick & tired of all “that’s opened” 2 me (it’s for nothing, no one learns – no proof, no one wins anyth – just time that passes degeaba, numbers that don’t do anything). I have no problems otherwise. ^^ Very, very, very & extremely sad! There’s nothing there but pain. My real healing can only start to occur after… <I don’t know> & there’s nothing I can do to help, influence the course of, make any change etc… I got no help, only used for • or • (sacks of grains ~ always filling somebody else’s pockets ~ ). knowing what that might be (I don’t) I’d have different stance (outcome from opinion). All in vain… Despise… I’ve been patient enough… Degeaba… I’m not used in a mechanism I agree with. I WOULD DO SOMETHING! All I do – unseen. Doesn’t count (no proof – ever – only dreamy things, not MY dream). Wanna know more about my dream ⟲… Healing…Mine! But “My real healing can only start to occur after..” And on and on again. Every day hurts. Doing anything hurts.I’m used! Not agreeing! Slept a lot but got no rest! (settings…shit…nothing…Nothing..)
💕Aching 4 love not blatant lies; ⟲ Tired of doing the same shit with no result but promises HaHa 🐟🐟🐟
Cuvinte “rele”:  Fiecare zi poate fi o bucurie daca <focus on what matters>. In viziunea mea, niciodata nu cotizam pentru altii cu care nu sunt de acord. Toti cei cu care sunt de acord suna de parca au aceeasi problema cu a mea, “nu putem face nimic” ⟲ Si oricat “dau” = 0; over & over again only the lies float on top ~ [Crude truths] – What’s been [i]proven[/i]. Iar cei cu care nu sunt de acord, nu conteaza!
As mai scrie, dar… Tot ce am scris pana acum (aici, blog)… Again & again… Makes sense the same… Anything new = Nothing new. No proof… Whispers of ignorants tell same stories, different ways of expression = nothing, rumegus, nothing. I have not seen one proof in lumea celor concludente ca sa imi vina sa  continui. Sa storc nu e sa dau de bunavoie, ceva nu e natural asa… Toate jurnalele/posturile/tot pana acum = degeaba. “Ei tot mor” 🙂
Vreau sa incerc orice abordare noua (cu adevarat noua nu recicland si ruland aceleasi kkturi altfel* nu e altfel, proven time after time. Months of Nothing – YT playlist) , dar ma lovesc de aceiasi tampiti + am tot facut asta pana acum. Makes no sense!
*[see the great reset conspiracy here too, agendaXXXX & related subjects ~ cause I’m #psychic ~ faptul ca sunt Psychic inseamna mai mult decat sa pun niste informatii pe categorii, vreau sa invat. Nimeni nu vrea sa invete cu adevarat, R Guy e mai sfios ca mine la capitolul asta. Imi pare rau R guy, nu am incredere in tine. Tot ce ai facut pana acum = degeaba ca si ce am facut eu dar aplicat la tine. Satula sa iti vad semnele, pentru ca nu duc nicaieri, tot ce primesc eu = insulte si umilinte, contrare naturii mele si scuzele cu T.. HaHa.. Scuzele cu T… si pe vremea cand eram mai proasta, aveam aceeasi parere. RE RE RE & nothing else! *sigh* Desigur, e dragut sa discutam, ador micile tale semne, dar nu asta caut, daca mi le trimiti gen dovezi, e rau. Daca e comunicare, e bine. Foarte destept dar prost in acelasi timp e IMPOSIBIL (My mind isi da duhul💥 trying to calculate{feel} this about you). Faptul ca eu nu pot sa simt ce inseamna pentru tine, e rau. Nu sunt lasata sa vad – Ok. N-am ce face. Deci degeaba. Nu pot sa ma gandesc la tine, sau sa ma indragostesc de tine {Vreau sa iubesc cu un scop, nu cai verzi pe pereti ca si pana acum!}, si ce optiuni ai tu, -ffs nu pot sa cred ca am ajuns sa discutam asa despre asta- E mult prea aiurea, iti alegi din ce aleg altii pentru tine nu e deloc alegere.].
Ei tot mor
Ei tot mor
Ei tot mor
.
I’m sorry but I can’t kill. (it’s not mine 2 take, even if illusion).
~

Podcasthttps://anchor.fm/ishkira-wind/episodes/Citesc-eqneu3 ~ Citesc din Filozofia Hermetica – Hermes Mercurius Trismegistus.

————————

I got my mind set on you ~ Someone in my dream ~ not the dreams I’m dreaming when I sleep ~~~

But it’s gonna take money ~ Oh what is money, honey? Every month, my baby is killed. Not willing to try this route again!

A whole lotta spending money ~ To spend it on what? ♥ Hold hands and go someplace nice? I would dare to dream but they’re so scared! Scarred ..And all the healers are Asleep.
It’s gonna take plenty of money
To do it right child ~

It’s gonna take time

A whole lot of precious time ~ I’ve given all on this front. All. I’m still stuck here. The ticking goes faster or slower or what’s normal anyway… According to someone else’s Choice… Who? Not my mission to point it. It’s already known! {but you don’t sayanything}
It’s gonna take patience and time, ummm ~ I’ve given all there was To Give on this front! (It was never meant to be a front that way, you know?)
To do it, to do it, to do it, to do it, to do it
To do it right child

DO IT RIGHT! If you need anything from me while they’re staring, it’s not right! ♥

I got my mind set on you
I got my mind set on you
I got my mind set on you
I got my mind set on you
  ~ I crave something so similar too, you lie, lie, lie. You force me to lie.. Through Letters & symbols that You Know will be translated Wrong  where it matters.  

And this time I know it’s for real ~ How many times now? It’s humiliating for someone made out of what I’m made out of!

The feelings that I feel
I know if I put my mind to it
I know that I really can do it
~ Me too.

I got my mind set on you
Set on you
I got my mind set on you
Set on you

💗

But = Zero. But I love this song!

—————————————
R.E.M – Drive
Smack, crack, bushwhacked
Tie another one to your racks, baby
Hey kids, rock and roll
Nobody tells you where to go, baby
What if I ride? What if you walk?
What if you rock around the clock?
Tick-tock, tick-tock
What if you did? What if you walk?
What if you tried to get off, baby?
Hey, kids, where are you?
Nobody tells you what to do, baby
Hey kids, shake a leg
Maybe you’re crazy in the head, baby
Maybe you did, maybe you walked
Maybe you rocked around the clock
Tick-tock, tick-tock
Maybe I ride, maybe you walk
Maybe I drive to get off, baby
Hey kids, shake a leg
Maybe you’re crazy in the head, baby
Ollie, ollie, ollie ollie ollie
Ollie ollie in come free, baby
Hey, kids, where are you?
Nobody tells you what to do, baby
Smack, crack, shack-a-lack
Tie another one to your backs, baby
Hey kids, rock and roll
Nobody tells you where to go, baby
Maybe you did, maybe you walk
Maybe you rock around the clock
Tick-tock, tick-tock
Maybe I ride, maybe you walk
Maybe I drive to get off, baby
Hey kids, where are you?
Nobody tells you what to do, baby
Hey kids, rock and roll
Nobody tells you where to go, baby, baby, baby

A tale that wasn’t right

A Tale That Wasn’t Right

[Verse 1]

Here I stand all alone
Have my mind turned to stone
Have my heart filled up with ice
To avoid its breakin’ twice

[Verse 2]
Thanks to you, my dear old friend
But you can’t help, this is the end
Of a tale that wasn’t right
I won’t have no sleep tonight

[Chorus]
In my heart, in my soul
I really hate to pay this toll
Should be strong, young and bold
But the only thing I feel is pain

[Verse 3]
It’s all right, we’ll stay friends
Trustin’ in my confidence
And let’s say it’s just all right
You won’t sleep alone tonight

[Chorus]
In my heart, in my soul
I really hate to pay this toll
Should be strong, young and bold
But the only thing I feel is pain

[Solo: Mike]

[Chorus]
With my heart, with my soul
Some guys cry, you’ve bought and sold
They’ve been strong, young and bold
And they say, “Play this song again”

[Chorus/Outro]
In my heart, in my soul
I really hate to pay this toll
Should be strong, young and bold
But the only thing I feel is pain

~~~
Been listening to this song quite a lot on the radio lately, I find it very inspiring ♥
~~~
or
1

Maybe Tomorrow

I’ve been down, and I’m wondering why

These little black clouds keep walking around
With me
With me

It wastes time, and I’d rather be high
Think I’ll walk me outside and buy a rainbow smile
But be free
They’re all free

So maybe tomorrow
I’ll find my way home
So maybe tomorrow
I’ll find my way home

I look around at a beautiful life
I’ve been the upperside of down, been the inside of out
But we breathe
We breathe

I wanna breeze and an open mind
I wanna swim in the ocean, wanna take my time
For me
All me

So maybe tomorrow
I’ll find my way home
So maybe tomorrow
I’ll find my way home

So maybe tomorrow
I’ll find my way home
So maybe tomorrow
I’ll find my way home

So maybe tomorrow
I’ll find my way home
So maybe tomorrow
I’ll find my way home

Be well.

Articol nou.

It’s the only way, really? What I’m interested in is still hidden from me. Cheap tricks, annoying to me. 

Cut me off from what? I know I’d rather be cut off from this mess that I did not agree with (or to partake in) to begin with, with incomplete data as I had it before.. Bla bla.

Loved the view that night, but I got weird hints that it’s something like me masturbating thinking about stuff I don’t like, so I forgot the enjoyment quickly ~ smh
This was a greeting. 
Between this or “I piss on you”, saying back “Me too”, more than just breaking the 4th wall, was more fun.
I do appreciate my fans though, if only I could recognize them as well, otherwise, I’ve said it before, WE’RE ALL USED for SHIT.
I can’t just imagine you’re what the waves whisper or what my mind wants! Would be incorrect & unfair towards you.
👁
Cute game.
Ony.
————————————————-
Din jurnal: (am scris azi dupa ce m-am jucat Rift, faceam o invazie si am fost delogata aiurea, m-am relogat imediat si s-au intamplat iar ciudatenii. Macar de as intelege de ce. Ca asa de imaginat drame m-am saturat.)
15.02 “New page” ~ I don’t want a minion as a lover. Bla bla… I would’ve never allow a “minion” to make me feel, something that a lover/ guy that courts me* would do. It’s more than just confusing. We’re both used. 🙁 Forget… Die… I’m still here.
* I don’t want to be “courted”  now. Not until I understand precisely what happened… With no doubt left. It’s not a  leap of faith…
++ Dear whoever. I can’t enjoy your efforts when weirdos/ I don’t know who look at me, interpreting various things… I never agreed to such thing, said this before. Same shit as usual. Sometimes I feel that I’m caressing the thin line I NEED to cross over in order to understand, but I’m not allowed to really see, so we don’t get enlightened. 
Pain, nothingness, the feelies which don’t really stimulate me… Nu am chef sa ma duc iar in sect 2 sa aduc chestii… Vreau sa stau o zi in casa pt ca am tot umblat si nu imi place! Detest tot acum 🙂 
Dreamt of my ex again. Talking… I don’t like dreaming of him. Feel I didn’t learn anyth.. Just different view of same shit in “real life” 🙁
~
14.02 
* Ninja turtle with red
* HARP shit in bus…felt pressure & weird switches in my head, around the trigger. Tests or discussions, I don’t know. Told him if I knew I talked to him too when I was with my ex (“through” my ex) nu l-as mai fi considerat atat de prost. Si am fi discutat chestii mai interesante poate la un alt nivel. Button (?). Nu am inteles. 
Annoyed I keep getting questions/situations about ex, other guys I fucked, thought of, or the Twitch guy. Meanwhile, I still don’t know what rly happened. V upset & not scared…Hm…Word…Not fearful… Can’t think about what I want to make order in my mind. + Spies. + No privacy. + Aparentele + Fufele/ Fufa sau ce naiba se intampla de ma insulta la fiecare pas cand ma “joc” si nici nu stiu cu cine (guy)… Keep getting hints about “the double” – I’m clueless about that too. Insulted & sad ~ Feeling used.
Saci de gunoi Magnetic – lol.
~
Daca nu imi spui doar pentru ca nu vrei sa auzi Nu-ul meu, nu stiu ce sa zic. Am motivele mele, nu? Ar trebui respectate. Mascarada asta tampita ma enerveaza, nu rezolva nimic, nimeni nu a invatat nimic nou cu adevarat (bun). Si Progres? Acumen. 

                               

..

We hold the secret to a dream
We keep it wrapped in chains
Locked inside a mystery

We climb a stairway to the stars
Through doorways of the heart
Step inside the magic stars

Chorus
Gaze into my crystal ball
See what lies behind the wall
Can’t you feel the wonder of it all
In my crystal ball

You veil your eyes in fantasy
Let’s pull the curtain back
Distant worlds, so much to see

Chorus
Gaze into my Crystal Ball
Ssee what lies behind the wall
Can’t you feel the wonder of it all
In my crystal ball

I wanna know you, come on let me show you the way
I really wanna hold you, reach out to these hands of fate

I wanna know you, come on let me show you the way
I really wanna hold you, reach out to these hands of fate
This is the moment we’ve been waiting for, oh yeah

Chorus
Gaze into my Crystal Ball
Ssee what lies behind the wall
Can’t you feel the wonder of it all
In my crystal ball

Au revoir!

bla

WTF.

proof of nothing

worth mentioning no

why do?

No know.

https://www.mediafax.ro/tehnologie/noi-imagini-cu-suprafata-planetei-marte-surprinse-de-catre-instrumentul-cassis-foto-19916510

Poze vechi cu mine

Imi plac nu imi plac nu conteaza; daca iti plac nu ma intereseaza, daca nu, la fel.

*each picture holds a special place in my heart* For I… blabla.

Goddess
Inspiring red
A mask I loved
Hmmm
O da.
Nu simteam nimic.
Mesajul nu a fost inteles. Literele nu erau doar de forma. Invitatie? Hmm… Pentru cine? *wink*
Bani si sanatate. La momentul respectiv nu aveam bani dar era trendy sa se vorbeasca despre financial ruin si findoms, si asta a fost my take on it. Bancnota de 1 dolar si multe carduri goale. DA BINE!
I did ^^ == same shit but wronger. Ahahahahaha.
BUG?
Invoke BUG again?
No.
I simply cannot take this as an answer, or proceeding step in our interaction.
Green grows the lily oh
Right among the bushes oh
A gentleman was passing by
And he stopped for a drink
As he was dry
[Chorus]:
At the well below the valley oh
Green grows the lily oh
Right among the bushes oh
My pack is full unto the brim
And if I were to stoop I might fall in
[Chorus]
If your true love was passing by
You’d fill him a drink if he were dry
[Chorus]
She swore by grass, she swore by corn
Her true love had never been born
[Chorus]
He said: Young girl you’re swearing wrong
Six fine children you’ve born
[Chorus]
If you be the man of noble fame
You’ll tell to me the father of them
[Chorus]
There’s two of them by your brother John
At the well below the valley oh
Another two by your uncle Dan
At the well below the valley oh
Another two by your father dear
At the well below the valley oh
Green grows the lily oh
[Chorus]
If you be the man of noble fame
You’ll tell to me what happened to them
[Chorus]
There’s two buried ‘neath the kitchen door
At the well below the valley oh
Another two near the stable door
At the well below the valley oh
Another two just beside the well
At the well below the valley oh
All of them outside the graveyard wall
[Chorus]
If you be the man of noble fame
You’ll tell to me what’ll happen to me
[Chorus]
You’ll be seven years of ringing a bell
At the well below the valley oh
Seven years of burning in hell
At the well below the valley oh
Green grows the lily oh
Right among the bushes oh
I’ll be seven years of ringing a bell
But the Lord above might save my soul (I don’t think so)
From burning in hell at the well below the valley oh
Green grows the lily oh
Right among the bushes oh !
Green grows the lily oh
Right among the bushes oh
Green grows the lily oh
Right among the bushes oh…
Cu colegii din 9B
Waiting for this to hatch, dar nu mai imi place nici un joc de cand sunt atacata pe toate fronturile.
despre videoclipul cu care am inceput acest post.
Am auzit ca inseamna ceva, apoi am auzit ca nu conteaza (explicatie, ca sa nu se inteleaga gresit. Acele cifre arata ba ora, ba minutul la care am postat in live chat. Am avut un gand intuitiv cum ca in anumite calcule/algoritmi, nu se tine cont de ce inseamna cu adevarat acele cifre si sunt folosite la ceva rau). 
Dar conteaza, cand vne vorba de…
Nu stiu sigur
Nu am insinuat nimic decat sa RERERERERE pet tot ce am zis pana acum sub o forma sau alta. 
Daca tu esti 100% cifre si nu stii sigur si imi dai mie durere.
PA.
Daca Pa nu e o optiune.
Atunci? 
><><><>
><><><>
><><><>
><><><>

Am asistat la chestii mult mai groaznice decat aceste mici neintelegeri, si nu mai vreau 🙂

Ramai cu bine,
💋

Dream fragments and pictures

Din jurnal:

 Ce vreau eu nu e in lumea asta

05.02   (aproape sa scriu 03-lol). Sleep paralysis experience. Simt ca am dormit mai mult de 2 ore. ~ Eram in sect. 2, era noapte, ieseam din bloc (?) nu stiu unde ma duceam (la magazin – lol, ar fi trebuit sa fie inchise la ora aia). Poarta de la locul de joaca ptr. copii din spatele blocurilor… Ultima data cand am fost pe aici nu era asa (sentiment ciudat). Acum avea buton de deschidere automata, metalic. [Ciudat, desi mergeam in directia ↓ am deschis usa ↑]. Am v Was wandering , had a rolled cigarette. Am simtit ceva ciudat, m-am speriat – Am luat-o mai repede si am inchis usa in spatele meu. *spiral* Sleep paralisys state, I fell to the ground, pareau a fi saci de dormit acolo… O camera… Blurry… S-a napustit asupra mea un caine mare (a venit pe unde am venit si eu, pe masura ce se apropia simteam cum mi se intensifica ‘frica’ desi nu imi era frica. Ceva ciudat generat). Nu imi era frica de el pt ca stiam ca e cu stapanul… Parea un caine bun… <Sleep paralysis state>… Aware of environment…O camera ciudata cu o canapea. Stapanul cainelui, cu el pe canapea. Parea un tip dragut. I-am vazut corpul, fata, dar am simtit sa ii spun: Nu ma pot uita in ochii tai! Apoi mi s-a deformat vocea,de parca nu puteam controla ceva atat de natural ca vorbitul… Eerie atmosphere. I’am zis: ma doare cand se intampla asta… Parca trec dintr-o realitate in alta. (Ce s-a intamplat cand a venit el cu cainele. Ce legatura are asta cu timpul? A? ???). Mi-a zis… Ai invatat… Nicknameul tau… Felt weird.  Told him… Ishkira inseamna soim vanator… Vocea mea suna f. ciudat cand vorbeam. Nu imi gaseam tigara.S-a apropiat de mine, m-a apucat, detalii lipsa… Simteam ca parca ar vrea sa imi faca rau la cum ma apucase, I imagined 2 guys fighting, ziceam in sinea mea ceva de genul: Tu vrei sa ma bati, dar nu imi faci nimic? WTF? A inceput sa se metamorfozeze ciudat, nu il mai vedeam, si a vorbit pe o voce (nice audio effect) de Overlord, sea creature, metallic, electric… Imi amintesc ca mi-a zis… (Parca vroia sa ma traga in “dimensiunea lui”) Talk to you soon onboard… Am vazut aroma unor momente din trecut cu Stefan, parca il luam in brate, fara sa il iau in brate, ethereal… Veils of energy…Flowing…up & down… Am simtit impuls sa imi imaginez ceva SF/monstruos… Dar Stefan era trist… 😉 Am vizualizat o fata zambind cu pumnii inclestati, in fighting pose… Nu stiu de ce… Detalii furate… Nu imi pasa de fetele lor si ma enerveza zambetele false din reclame… Apoi… M-am trezit. Am inceput sa vorbesc in sinea mea incercand sa descifrez detalii din vis. Am auzit “You are the spaceship” ~ ceva ce a spus Occult Priestess. Nu stiu cine ce a inteles din treaba asta. Nu mi-a placut visul… Nici personajele… Nu stiu ce a fost… My issues are the same… Oare ce o fi insemnat “nu ma pot uita in ochii tai”… Dried paint falling on my journal page. Nu mai vreau sa am de-a face cu “lumea lor” asa… Vreau sa fac… Ce stiu eu sa fac si nu pot sa ma gandesc la… Sa visez la… Sa vorbesc… Cu sens.
21.32. Inca am de-a face cu lumea lor. Mi se da peste nas in “real time”. Tot nu inteleg the feelies. As prefera sa se opreasca. Mai ales daca e o “invitatie la masturbate” 🙁 ~ Aud ambele variante.
06.02.21 Ma simt aiurea, ghici de ce. Atat de umilitor sa trebuiasca sa ma gandesc la …*spiral* care nu  ma intereseaza d.p.d.v. sexual doar pt. ca… Alegerea altcuiva (+the no choice of others)
De atata timp
Degeaba
No (real) friend
No consolation (working!)
No coping for real.
Only a vast field of ppl, characters I don’t like, lies, double meanings. The sword not cutting where it should. No intimacy, truth shared between 2.
I hate/despise masturbating. I hate even more doing that for “work”, even more in public/free. If a guy has no problem with me doing that, I wouldn’t like him & I can’t live & function (~ optimal vs ideal -> depends on the level you see stuff from) WITHOUT 😉 ~ Default settings, hidden gifts. Treasure chest @ the bottom of the sea. Hate all their failed projects. I feel smth v simple (easy 2 process/apply) is Hidden, don’t know why (fear – I have no fear). Could change everyth & I’ve seen no signs of correctshit, quite the contrary. No communication – no honesty.
Hurts more cause they didn’t rly let me study the details I needed 2 understand +++ I harm myself with showing the brainwashed meanings – porn & sex stuff that has nothing 2 do with love in love language. Nobody is happy so how could they ever tell me I’m wrong/bad? I didn’t even get… bla bla service shit. No. Slavery. Can’t even choose the ones I’d roleplay that with. & For what? Totul e calculat ptr. distrugere/uzura/unhappiness. Imi e scarba cand le vad toate urmele sau ce naiba sunt cacaturile puse in propozitii care ar fi trebuit sa insemne ceva.
Simt ca n-am lasat nimic nespus si totusi daca … degeaba … atunci tot … degeaba….
Profunzimea durerii – combinatie de disrespect + intentie infundata. I can’t relax knowing I have no choice, this is sickness & sick ppl & I don’t know what else. Zero what I want. 🙁 RLY. I function in vain. I can’t live knowing this.
Ma inspira chestii ciudate si tot neinteleasa sunt 🙂
De ce mereu cand merg la Biserica trebuie sa se intample ceva?
lol
Nuuuuuuu!
Souvenirs from …
The crack of doom
A fairy door.
Ahahahahaha. Multumesc pentru instiintare.
Gif facut din autobuz (thx giphy!)
Daca te doare nu mai imi place.
As vrea sa inteleg de ce si cum te doare, ca tot n-am ce face.
“Nu”
Vremuri tulburi.
Latest whatevering session:
Thx for reading bye.
Megadeth – A Tout Le Monde Lyrics
Don’t remember where I was
I realized life was a game
The more seriously I took things
The harder the rules became
I had no idea what it’d cost
My life passed before my eyes
I found out how little I accomplished
All my plans denied
So as you read this know my friends
I’d love to stay with you all
Please smile when you think of me
My body’s gone that’s all
A tout le monde (To all the world)
A tous mes amis (To all my friends)
Je vous aime (I love you)
Je dois partir (I have to leave)
These are the last words
I’ll ever speak
And they’ll set me free
If my heart was still alive
I know it would surely break
And my memories left with you
There’s nothing more to say
Moving on is a simple thing
What it leaves behind is hard
You know the sleeping feel no more pain
And the living are scarred.

Ceva special ca al meu n-are nimeni si e inutil sa va vorbesc despre asta.


Airbag – Machines and men.
Here they come
Marching on
One by one
They’ll be gone
With boots and guns
Shouting loud
Machines and men
They’re heaven sent
Here they come
Marching on
One by one
They’ll be gone
With boots and guns
Shouting loud
Machines and men
They’re heaven sent
I wanna get out
I wanna be free
So come on now
And get me out
I wanna get out
I wanna be free
So come on now
And get me out
I wanna get out
Does it make you afraid
Or drive you insane
You better run
Cause here they come
I wanna get out
I wanna be free
So come on now
And get me out
I wanna get out
I wanna be free
So come on now
And get me out
I wanna get out
I wanna get out
~
~
~

Soen – Lotus

[Intro]
Gather around
All the things that we admire
To be here is where I wanted to be
To abandon who I was
Gather around
As we’re pushed towards the fire
We’ve been tricked into believing that all
Starts and ends within our walls
[Verse 1]
Gather around
Holding close your sons and daughters
Promise them that we will all be alright
Let them know you love them all
Talk to yourself
Let your essence be the answer
While we chase the meaning of who we are
Navigating through a storm
[Verse 2]
Gather around and follow me
Something misled us to this
Wanting it all is poverty
Rich is the one who is free
Be the one who wakes up
All of those who roam
[Guitar solo]
[Bridge]
Shake your head to the sides, wake the animal inside of you
Run away from it all, let the wildness be your home
Plant a tree, kill a man, let your instincts be in charge of you
Where you walk, what you dream, measures who you really are
[Outro]
Turn to your friends
Let them face the one you mirror
And the demons that now rest on your side
They will leave you on your own
~~~
Nu vreau sa compun imaginea sau povestea cuiva cu care sa fiu… Daca nu e (own will)… WTF am I even doing in here anymore 🙁 S-au folosit de mine pentru… Compuneri si imagini… In trecere prin nimic… Ha Ha Ha Ha. 
In prezentul meu ( ca doar, ce e) continui sa ma intalnesc cu odoruri din trecut, in mod nejustificat neinteresante. Absolut dezgustator si nimic nu mai e fun indiferent cat de ‘bine’ arata.
Some things I’d like to write about, I can’t even write in my own journal.
Thank you for this

Dirty Granny Tails

Time to throw away your burden

to ride the broom and never

look back to your previous life

it’s time to reap the roots of past

Go fly above your weakness

the sky above is endless

look below this world is small

could not contain your godly soul

Trembling of my heart

rippling of my dream

distance takes apart

all that I have been

Lost in skies of velvet

lovelier than ever

counting on myself alone

Never break always trust your inner sense

wonders wait you on your road

look ahead miracles are everywhere

life will take you by the hand
 
~
Thanks for recommending me this song, whoever you were 🙂 I still remember your name, messenger (Ym) id, but to what avail 👀. You shocked me when you told me that thing with the T-shirt, you know, the one you throw behind the sofa.
Take good care of yerselfez.

:(

 Why?

Someone told me some things about some ‘workers’ today. I didn’t really understand (fully), I don’t want to judge. It’s not what it appears to be at first sight [for me], but then again, I wrote about this before. Workers to make up the noise ~around~ me, so… We can… Go on… Go… On… How…? Nobody is happy.

Thank you

Lots of weirdness ~ 

Water that boils slower, and also cools down slower, and other details..(where I’m about to move back)..

Pare ca a trecut mai putin timp, de ce? 

Vreau sa aleg cu cine stau de vorba inainte de somn.

So I can…

     

I wear my sunglasses at night
So I can, so I can
Watch you weave
Then breathe your story lines
And I wear my sunglasses at night
So I can, so I can
Keep track of the visions in my eyes.

💋


B.D. Energy

*almost 2 minutes to midnight* (?)
Posted March, 2020. One of my first takes at showing you how I do the samethingwiththesamething, whatevering & how I reach #ORGASM ~ Not much has changed since then. Hundreds of videos & media pieces through which I tried to reach… Who?
< >
Not for money, not for free, honey.
Nu e mare filozofie, nu e chiar nimic.
[Brainwash/Trauma NOT love~]
Nimic nu te va face sa te simti mai bine

https://youtu.be/G08WF_oKRnA

Cum pot aprecia ce inseamna cu adevarat cateva secunde, cand eu nici macar 10 minute inr-o zi nu pot face ce vreau 🙂

Nimeni nu e fericit.
Nimeni.

Fericirea mea nu e tranzactionabila.
,

~
[Verse 1]
Kill for gain, or shoot to maim
But we don’t need a reason
The golden goose is on the loose
And never out of season

Blackened pride still burns inside
This shell of bloody treason
Here’s my gun for a barrel of fun
For the love of living death

[Pre-Chorus]
The killer’s breed or the Demon’s seed
The glamour, the fortune, the pain
Go to war again, blood is freedom’s stain
Don’t you pray for my soul anymore?

[Chorus]
2 minutes to midnight
The hands that threaten doom

2 minutes to midnight
To kill the unborn in the womb

[Verse 2]
The blind men shout “Let the creatures out
We’ll show the unbelievers”

The napalm screams of human flames
Of a prime time Belsen feast … yeah!
As the reasons for the carnage cut their meat and lick the gravy
We oil the jaws of the war machine and feed it with our babies

[Pre-Chorus]
The killer’s breed or the Demon’s seed
The glamour, the fortune, the pain
Go to war again, blood is freedom’s stain
Don’t you pray for my soul anymore?

[Chorus]
2 minutes to midnight
The hands that threaten doom
2 minutes to midnight
To kill the unborn in the womb

[Instrumental break/guitar solo]

[Verse 3]
The body bags and little rags of children torn in two
And the jellied brains of those who remain to put the finger right on you

As the madmen play on words and make us all dance to their song
To the tune of starving millions to make a better kind of gun


[Pre-Chorus]
The killer’s breed or the Demon’s seed
The glamour, the fortune, the pain
Go to war again, blood is freedom’s stain
Don’t you pray for my soul anymore?

[Chorus]
2 minutes to midnight
The hands that threaten doom
2 minutes to midnight
To kill the unborn in the womb

[Outro]
Midnight
Midnight
Midnight
It’s all night
Midnight
Midnight
Midnight
It’s all night