Nu am nimic.

Nu am nimic

https://mmmylittlecorner.blogspot.com/2020/01/hello-world.html

https://mmmylittlecorner.blogspot.com/2020/10/faptul-ca.html

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https://web.archive.org/web/20130515015015/http://goddessazra.blogspot.com/

Thanks the Wayback Machine.

I could talk a lot in spoken or written words about my past experiences as a camgirl, cam model, whatever, but it’s useless 🙂
I used to have a blog for years, didn’t really care about it. A fost doar o tentativa, sa am si eu ceva. Fapturile de la care m-am inspirat faceau altceva, nu ce vedeam eu (nu e o scuza). Nu cautam sa invat, era despre vanzare, nu? Cei care au incercat sa fie prietenosi ~ thx ~ am fost si eu prietenoasa cu ei, mereu ‘not allowed’ de aceleasi limite/ziduri carora inca nu le gasesc sensul. Nimic nou!
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Me in glasses.
Din jurnal:
21.02 Not moody or pessimistic. Just another day with a limited set of things to do, regardless of what I do, nothing good (really good) will happen so, in contradiction with the purpose of doing anything – I don’t wanna do anything. Penalized regardless. I don’t trust/rly like anyone. I talk to so many, but I have no one 2 rly talk to. Sick & tired of all “that’s opened” 2 me (it’s for nothing, no one learns – no proof, no one wins anyth – just time that passes degeaba, numbers that don’t do anything). I have no problems otherwise. ^^ Very, very, very & extremely sad! There’s nothing there but pain. My real healing can only start to occur after… <I don’t know> & there’s nothing I can do to help, influence the course of, make any change etc… I got no help, only used for • or • (sacks of grains ~ always filling somebody else’s pockets ~ ). knowing what that might be (I don’t) I’d have different stance (outcome from opinion). All in vain… Despise… I’ve been patient enough… Degeaba… I’m not used in a mechanism I agree with. I WOULD DO SOMETHING! All I do – unseen. Doesn’t count (no proof – ever – only dreamy things, not MY dream). Wanna know more about my dream ⟲… Healing…Mine! But “My real healing can only start to occur after..” And on and on again. Every day hurts. Doing anything hurts.I’m used! Not agreeing! Slept a lot but got no rest! (settings…shit…nothing…Nothing..)
💕Aching 4 love not blatant lies; ⟲ Tired of doing the same shit with no result but promises HaHa 🐟🐟🐟
Cuvinte “rele”:  Fiecare zi poate fi o bucurie daca <focus on what matters>. In viziunea mea, niciodata nu cotizam pentru altii cu care nu sunt de acord. Toti cei cu care sunt de acord suna de parca au aceeasi problema cu a mea, “nu putem face nimic” ⟲ Si oricat “dau” = 0; over & over again only the lies float on top ~ [Crude truths] – What’s been [i]proven[/i]. Iar cei cu care nu sunt de acord, nu conteaza!
As mai scrie, dar… Tot ce am scris pana acum (aici, blog)… Again & again… Makes sense the same… Anything new = Nothing new. No proof… Whispers of ignorants tell same stories, different ways of expression = nothing, rumegus, nothing. I have not seen one proof in lumea celor concludente ca sa imi vina sa  continui. Sa storc nu e sa dau de bunavoie, ceva nu e natural asa… Toate jurnalele/posturile/tot pana acum = degeaba. “Ei tot mor” 🙂
Vreau sa incerc orice abordare noua (cu adevarat noua nu recicland si ruland aceleasi kkturi altfel* nu e altfel, proven time after time. Months of Nothing – YT playlist) , dar ma lovesc de aceiasi tampiti + am tot facut asta pana acum. Makes no sense!
*[see the great reset conspiracy here too, agendaXXXX & related subjects ~ cause I’m #psychic ~ faptul ca sunt Psychic inseamna mai mult decat sa pun niste informatii pe categorii, vreau sa invat. Nimeni nu vrea sa invete cu adevarat, R Guy e mai sfios ca mine la capitolul asta. Imi pare rau R guy, nu am incredere in tine. Tot ce ai facut pana acum = degeaba ca si ce am facut eu dar aplicat la tine. Satula sa iti vad semnele, pentru ca nu duc nicaieri, tot ce primesc eu = insulte si umilinte, contrare naturii mele si scuzele cu T.. HaHa.. Scuzele cu T… si pe vremea cand eram mai proasta, aveam aceeasi parere. RE RE RE & nothing else! *sigh* Desigur, e dragut sa discutam, ador micile tale semne, dar nu asta caut, daca mi le trimiti gen dovezi, e rau. Daca e comunicare, e bine. Foarte destept dar prost in acelasi timp e IMPOSIBIL (My mind isi da duhul💥 trying to calculate{feel} this about you). Faptul ca eu nu pot sa simt ce inseamna pentru tine, e rau. Nu sunt lasata sa vad – Ok. N-am ce face. Deci degeaba. Nu pot sa ma gandesc la tine, sau sa ma indragostesc de tine {Vreau sa iubesc cu un scop, nu cai verzi pe pereti ca si pana acum!}, si ce optiuni ai tu, -ffs nu pot sa cred ca am ajuns sa discutam asa despre asta- E mult prea aiurea, iti alegi din ce aleg altii pentru tine nu e deloc alegere.].
Ei tot mor
Ei tot mor
Ei tot mor
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I’m sorry but I can’t kill. (it’s not mine 2 take, even if illusion).
~

Podcasthttps://anchor.fm/ishkira-wind/episodes/Citesc-eqneu3 ~ Citesc din Filozofia Hermetica – Hermes Mercurius Trismegistus.

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I got my mind set on you ~ Someone in my dream ~ not the dreams I’m dreaming when I sleep ~~~

But it’s gonna take money ~ Oh what is money, honey? Every month, my baby is killed. Not willing to try this route again!

A whole lotta spending money ~ To spend it on what? ♥ Hold hands and go someplace nice? I would dare to dream but they’re so scared! Scarred ..And all the healers are Asleep.
It’s gonna take plenty of money
To do it right child ~

It’s gonna take time

A whole lot of precious time ~ I’ve given all on this front. All. I’m still stuck here. The ticking goes faster or slower or what’s normal anyway… According to someone else’s Choice… Who? Not my mission to point it. It’s already known! {but you don’t sayanything}
It’s gonna take patience and time, ummm ~ I’ve given all there was To Give on this front! (It was never meant to be a front that way, you know?)
To do it, to do it, to do it, to do it, to do it
To do it right child

DO IT RIGHT! If you need anything from me while they’re staring, it’s not right! ♥

I got my mind set on you
I got my mind set on you
I got my mind set on you
I got my mind set on you
  ~ I crave something so similar too, you lie, lie, lie. You force me to lie.. Through Letters & symbols that You Know will be translated Wrong  where it matters.  

And this time I know it’s for real ~ How many times now? It’s humiliating for someone made out of what I’m made out of!

The feelings that I feel
I know if I put my mind to it
I know that I really can do it
~ Me too.

I got my mind set on you
Set on you
I got my mind set on you
Set on you

💗

But = Zero. But I love this song!

—————————————
R.E.M – Drive
Smack, crack, bushwhacked
Tie another one to your racks, baby
Hey kids, rock and roll
Nobody tells you where to go, baby
What if I ride? What if you walk?
What if you rock around the clock?
Tick-tock, tick-tock
What if you did? What if you walk?
What if you tried to get off, baby?
Hey, kids, where are you?
Nobody tells you what to do, baby
Hey kids, shake a leg
Maybe you’re crazy in the head, baby
Maybe you did, maybe you walked
Maybe you rocked around the clock
Tick-tock, tick-tock
Maybe I ride, maybe you walk
Maybe I drive to get off, baby
Hey kids, shake a leg
Maybe you’re crazy in the head, baby
Ollie, ollie, ollie ollie ollie
Ollie ollie in come free, baby
Hey, kids, where are you?
Nobody tells you what to do, baby
Smack, crack, shack-a-lack
Tie another one to your backs, baby
Hey kids, rock and roll
Nobody tells you where to go, baby
Maybe you did, maybe you walk
Maybe you rock around the clock
Tick-tock, tick-tock
Maybe I ride, maybe you walk
Maybe I drive to get off, baby
Hey kids, where are you?
Nobody tells you what to do, baby
Hey kids, rock and roll
Nobody tells you where to go, baby, baby, baby

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    • Ishkira says:

      🤣 ~ Who writes spam these days?

      Thank you for commenting.

      Here I talk a lil about this sort of thing: https://www.goddessazra.com/2021/07/stuff-6/

      Dear _ _ _ _ _ _,

      Daca ai ceva sa imi spui, daca vrei sa imi ceri ceva, zi-mi direct, nu prin cuvinte imprastiate in locuri din care eu sunt ‘libera’ sa inteleg ce vreau.
      Nu imi spune ca nu poti, pentru ca… (orice).

      ~

      Dear _ _ _ _ _ _,

      If you have something to tell me, if you want to ask me anything, tell me directly, not in words scattered in places where I am ‘free’ to understand what I want.
      Don’t tell me you can’t, because… (anything).

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